I just remembered how mad I am. It’s okay, Jesus said I would be (Gospel of Thomas) and I am. I am not going to deny this feeling right now, though I know I will move on past it to perfection. I’m mad because I have lived in a world built of untruths, packaged as the way to Peace and Perfection. I have been sold a bill of goods. I am mad because I see it now. I see the unreality being perpetuated before me in all in the Name of God my Father. I see the limitations imposed and taught. I understand how tradition has killed the spirit of the seeker.
Man has been told, by man, that all to be known is known. “The rules have been written and here they are. Don’t question, doubt or look any further.”
Jesus said, “Seek ye first, the Kingdom of God and all good things will be added unto thee.” Seek ye, you seek. When one is seeking, searching, they are digging, looking high and low for something they want, that is lost, not found to them.
Like the child’s game of “warmer-cooler” Jesus gave clues. “The Kingdom of God is at hand. It is not in the sky or over there.” He did not tell anyone to open a book. He had studied them, the Torah (the books of the old Testament), as well, but did not ever say one’s salvation or entrance into the Kingdom of God depended upon the quoting of any verse or knowing the linage of any of his ancestors.
He had good news, different news, He indicated that this knowledge of God was hidden from the intellects. So it wasn’t a thinking thing, and can’t be experienced by reading any instructions given by any other. It has to be sought beyond the mind. That’s where I have found God, beyond my mind, beyond my brain, out of my thinking.
Jesus told us to go away to a quiet place to spend time with God, a deserted place, a closet, seclusion, so one’s mind can detach from distractions, from the physical sensations of life and rest, so one can quiet one’s being as to hear the small still voice that continually speaks within. That is our God connection. That is the open door where God waits, ready in our hearts for acknowledgement. Let your mind take rest and just be. Be peaceful, restful, rest in the peace of God.
You may not hear God’s voice at first as the static of your mind may be so loud. It takes time to tune into the “God Channel,” but practice makes perfect. The more time one spends seeking God’s voice and wisdom, the more peaceful one will become without ever consciously being aware of direct thoughts or words. But as one makes this seeking a daily practice more good will come. It will become easier and more comfortable. Then, bit by bit, this peace will flow out into the rest of one’s life and as it does the seeker will begin to crave and thirst for more peace from their inner sanctum.
Part of this process is dropping the ego self, the mindful part of each of us who is constantly thinking, “Me, me, what about me?” And instead go into the silence with no agenda but comfort and peace, seeking to feel and know the presence of God. Changes, quiet changes are being made to one’s very being just by being a seeker. Subtle changes, awareness, knowings, thoughts, feelings and words become evident to one’s psyche while in and out of the quiet zone.
Gratitude and love are felt and naturally expressed. The load lightens. As one is inspired to act and as one does and is grateful for more, more wisdom teachings are handed to the seeker, student of life and love. It is not a way of learning. It is a way of knowing, knowing God’s love and knowing all God’s truth and wisdom.
There is a burn in the heart, yes, a most wonderful heartburn, a fire, an energy felt in the heart zone center of one’s physical self. It is the “Fire of Refinement”, as the alchemy of God purifies one’s soul changing a common metal, our humanness, into a Pure Golden Heart.
So why am I not going to church, to Mass? Because that information is not serving me anymore, it is actually hindering my path to enlightenment, to my full presence of the Kingdom of God. It is not that I don’t believe in God, and it is not that I don’t acknowledge the saving power of Christ’s message. It is that I through my own journey as a “seeker,” I have found a much more profound realization of God and a truer understanding of Jesus the Christ’s message.
I have physically been in some of the “holiest” places on earth, as declared by “the Church” and been moved only visually by the manmade beauty. Not at all moved spiritually, yet, stepping into the sunshine and breathing the fresh air I am filled with a Wondrous Loving Spirit that can be God and no less. I find God within as I settle my mind and body. At rest, at peace, He comes forward to me and fills me with His love and wisdom. I have found this “love of my life”, whom I have been seeking. All I desire is more closeness, more Divine Love filling my soul.
I do believe that others within the boundaries of the formal church have as well experienced this completeness, this wholeness, this holiness of which I speak and seek. But they have been far and few in between. And instead of holding them and their lives up as lanterns for the people, lighting the way, the people whom people have put in charge say: “No, you are not worthy. This sainthood is not for everyone. Who are you to ever begin to think that you could ever be so holy? Remember, you are but a sinner. You are lowly.” Many may argue that this is the message indeed, but I can only say that it was the message I received.
People are massed, herded and paraded through rituals that are to give comfort but to many they are but mere tradition. Jesus of Nazareth, as Christ, denied the “faith of his fathers” and walked his own path. He said each had to do this as well. Be a seeker, not a preacher or a follower.
Want to know; want to know God’s love. Seek ye first the Kingdom of God.
So I say, I am finding my own way, searching for clues, breadcrumbs dropped by others while they made their own journeys. Some will say, “This is not right. You are wrong!” I say, it is right for me I know. It may not be the path for you. There are many roads to the top of the mountain. Some are filled with weeds and boulders as they have hardly been traversed. Go your own way, but go in peace. May peace be with you, the peace that was meant to be.
And all that being said, I would love to find a spiritual community that supports my personal seeking and knowing experience. I so yearn to be able to communicate and share these profound, deep and true experiences I am having as I live this life. I want to touch another and be touched by another with skin on, who knows and is living a similar journey. Please put this person, these people in my path. Bring them to me. I want to live full. I want to share my joy.
Excerpted from the book Listen Hear, A Divine Love Story by Debra Clemente
Man has been told, by man, that all to be known is known. “The rules have been written and here they are. Don’t question, doubt or look any further.”
Jesus said, “Seek ye first, the Kingdom of God and all good things will be added unto thee.” Seek ye, you seek. When one is seeking, searching, they are digging, looking high and low for something they want, that is lost, not found to them.
Like the child’s game of “warmer-cooler” Jesus gave clues. “The Kingdom of God is at hand. It is not in the sky or over there.” He did not tell anyone to open a book. He had studied them, the Torah (the books of the old Testament), as well, but did not ever say one’s salvation or entrance into the Kingdom of God depended upon the quoting of any verse or knowing the linage of any of his ancestors.
He had good news, different news, He indicated that this knowledge of God was hidden from the intellects. So it wasn’t a thinking thing, and can’t be experienced by reading any instructions given by any other. It has to be sought beyond the mind. That’s where I have found God, beyond my mind, beyond my brain, out of my thinking.
Jesus told us to go away to a quiet place to spend time with God, a deserted place, a closet, seclusion, so one’s mind can detach from distractions, from the physical sensations of life and rest, so one can quiet one’s being as to hear the small still voice that continually speaks within. That is our God connection. That is the open door where God waits, ready in our hearts for acknowledgement. Let your mind take rest and just be. Be peaceful, restful, rest in the peace of God.
You may not hear God’s voice at first as the static of your mind may be so loud. It takes time to tune into the “God Channel,” but practice makes perfect. The more time one spends seeking God’s voice and wisdom, the more peaceful one will become without ever consciously being aware of direct thoughts or words. But as one makes this seeking a daily practice more good will come. It will become easier and more comfortable. Then, bit by bit, this peace will flow out into the rest of one’s life and as it does the seeker will begin to crave and thirst for more peace from their inner sanctum.
Part of this process is dropping the ego self, the mindful part of each of us who is constantly thinking, “Me, me, what about me?” And instead go into the silence with no agenda but comfort and peace, seeking to feel and know the presence of God. Changes, quiet changes are being made to one’s very being just by being a seeker. Subtle changes, awareness, knowings, thoughts, feelings and words become evident to one’s psyche while in and out of the quiet zone.
Gratitude and love are felt and naturally expressed. The load lightens. As one is inspired to act and as one does and is grateful for more, more wisdom teachings are handed to the seeker, student of life and love. It is not a way of learning. It is a way of knowing, knowing God’s love and knowing all God’s truth and wisdom.
There is a burn in the heart, yes, a most wonderful heartburn, a fire, an energy felt in the heart zone center of one’s physical self. It is the “Fire of Refinement”, as the alchemy of God purifies one’s soul changing a common metal, our humanness, into a Pure Golden Heart.
So why am I not going to church, to Mass? Because that information is not serving me anymore, it is actually hindering my path to enlightenment, to my full presence of the Kingdom of God. It is not that I don’t believe in God, and it is not that I don’t acknowledge the saving power of Christ’s message. It is that I through my own journey as a “seeker,” I have found a much more profound realization of God and a truer understanding of Jesus the Christ’s message.
I have physically been in some of the “holiest” places on earth, as declared by “the Church” and been moved only visually by the manmade beauty. Not at all moved spiritually, yet, stepping into the sunshine and breathing the fresh air I am filled with a Wondrous Loving Spirit that can be God and no less. I find God within as I settle my mind and body. At rest, at peace, He comes forward to me and fills me with His love and wisdom. I have found this “love of my life”, whom I have been seeking. All I desire is more closeness, more Divine Love filling my soul.
I do believe that others within the boundaries of the formal church have as well experienced this completeness, this wholeness, this holiness of which I speak and seek. But they have been far and few in between. And instead of holding them and their lives up as lanterns for the people, lighting the way, the people whom people have put in charge say: “No, you are not worthy. This sainthood is not for everyone. Who are you to ever begin to think that you could ever be so holy? Remember, you are but a sinner. You are lowly.” Many may argue that this is the message indeed, but I can only say that it was the message I received.
People are massed, herded and paraded through rituals that are to give comfort but to many they are but mere tradition. Jesus of Nazareth, as Christ, denied the “faith of his fathers” and walked his own path. He said each had to do this as well. Be a seeker, not a preacher or a follower.
Want to know; want to know God’s love. Seek ye first the Kingdom of God.
So I say, I am finding my own way, searching for clues, breadcrumbs dropped by others while they made their own journeys. Some will say, “This is not right. You are wrong!” I say, it is right for me I know. It may not be the path for you. There are many roads to the top of the mountain. Some are filled with weeds and boulders as they have hardly been traversed. Go your own way, but go in peace. May peace be with you, the peace that was meant to be.
And all that being said, I would love to find a spiritual community that supports my personal seeking and knowing experience. I so yearn to be able to communicate and share these profound, deep and true experiences I am having as I live this life. I want to touch another and be touched by another with skin on, who knows and is living a similar journey. Please put this person, these people in my path. Bring them to me. I want to live full. I want to share my joy.
Excerpted from the book Listen Hear, A Divine Love Story by Debra Clemente
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